Why Chivas USA is your new second favorite team

Blood brothers, sealing the pact. All part of the plan. - Steven Bisig-USA TODAY Sports

This week, and this week only, Chivas USA and Seattle Sounders are bffs. They might even be wearing those half-heart necklaces under their jerseys.

In less than a week's time the MLS regular season will be over and the shroud of mystery surrounding the MLS Cup Playoff seedings will be known to all. But at this juncture we cannot time travel to see what next week portends. And even if we could time travel, if some local visionary uncovered the mysteries of space and time, it'd be better to go back a month and a half ago and place money on NYRB winning the Supporter's Shield, following the advice of some handsome blogger's bold predictions.

What we know:

  1. The Seattle Sounders will not win the Supporter's Shield.
  2. The Seattle Sounders have qualified for the 2013 MLS Cup Playoffs.
  3. The Seattle Sounders could be anywhere from the 1st - 5th Seed.
  4. The 1st Seed gets homefield advantage throughout the playoffs.
  5. Putting mayonnaise on french fries is unnatural and weird.
  6. The Seattle Sounders play better at home than they do on the road.
  7. The two teams who could thwart the Seattle Sounders's hope at the 1st Seed are RSL and Portland.
  8. Chivas USA plays both RSL and Portland in the coming week.

What we don't know:

  1. The Seeding for the MLS Cup Playoffs.
  2. If Leonardo DiCaprio was still dreaming at the end of Inception.
  3. What DeAndre Yedlin's hair will look like next week.

Portland Timbers lead the Western Conference with 54 points. RSL is 2nd with 53. Seattle, LA Galaxy, and Colorado all have 51 points. There is a non-zero chance four of those five teams end the season at 54 points if the following occurs:

  1. Seattle Sounders defeat LA Galaxy.
  2. Colorado Rapids defeat Vancouver Whitecaps.
  3. Chivas USA defeat Portland Timbers.
  4. Chivas USA draws RSL.
That would leave the following point totals (in alphabetical order):

54 - Colorado Rapids
51 - LA Galaxy
54 - Portland Timbers
54 - RSL
54 - Seattle Sounders

Tie breaker time!

When two or more teams are tied in the standings on points, the following tiebreakers will be used in the sequence below, until one team ranks ahead of the other(s):

1. Most Wins

2. Goals For

3. Goal Differential

4. Fewest Disciplinary Points

5. Road Goals

6. Road Goal Differential

7. Home Goals

8. Home Goal Differential

9. Coin Toss (2 teams) or Drawing of Lots (3 or more)

Scenarios:

5th Seed - Seattle loss/draw combined with Colorado victory.

4th Seed - Seattle loss/draw combined with Colorado loss.

3rd Seed - Seattle win combined with RSL win and Portland win/draw.

2nd Seed - Seattle win combined with RSL loss/draw and Portland win/draw.

1st Seed - Seattle win combined with RSL loss/draw and Portland loss.

So what have we learned? Beginning this week, and this week only, Chivas USA is your new second favorite team, since Chivas USA is the team that plays both RSL and Portland. You know what to do, sportsfans.

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