I almost attacked a coworker this week when he walked in my office and said "I don't like Eddie Johnson. He's so lazy." Cooler heads prevailed, though and I was able to instruct him on styles of play, etc. Including the fact that when you have such a deadly goal-scorer in your attack, you don't necessarily want him wasting energy chasing down hopeless balls and pressuring where the pressure is not tactical. Players like Estrada necessarily don't "look" lazy because without his work rate and energy level, e would not be playing professionally. That is his "core competency". This ended up being a good discussion and I think he may have actually listened to me. So in honor of all our "lazy" players (past and present) I submit the following argument that Sounders are the laziest team in MLS: Fredy Montero - the original. He was so lazy for us he wouldn't even bother dribbling into legitimate goal-scoring range before letting loose a "laz"er beam shot from 35 yds into the roof of the net. Now he's doing lazy things in Portugal. Nkufo - OK, he was lazy. But he was ancient when he came here. Eddie Johnson - current "laziest" player. He's so lazy all he does is score goals and win games for cleub and country. Obafemi Martins - So lazy Friday night he could stick the landing on his flip. Deandre Yedlin - too lazy to finish his college career before becoming awesome. Also he play a lazy pass to Neagle for the goal the ball never even got any air, just a simple flat pass right to Neagle's foot: lazy). Lamar Neagle - He's lazy because a good, hustling, 4th forward wouldn't make decisions so difficult for Sigi. Why cant he just sit back and act like a 4th forward. No, he has to go and score game-winners when our first three aren't available. That was a lazy goal Friday too. One touch, are you kidding me? Laaaazy. Gspurning - first off, he's a goal keeper, they are always the laziest players. They get to use their hands, for Sigi's sake! Plus he keeps getting clean sheets. So lazy he doesn't want to dig the ball out of the back of the net, so he just doesn't let them in. Zack Scott - too last to bother playing for other teams. Just decided to stay in Seattle forever. Plus a non-lazy player would have beaten Rimando with that header Friday. too lazy to get a goal best the quickest goal keeper in the league. Sigi Schmid - the laziest coach ever. Too lazy to have to play non-starters. He just picks from among 18 legitimate starters every game (31 lineups in 32 games = Lazy). Front office/Owners - too lazy to search for good players. they just find the best - then say, "OK, how much for Deuce? 32 million? Is that all? Who do I make the check out to?" Funny how the laziest team in MLS is at the top of the table.