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Sports Illustrated Takes Their Cues from Seattle Offside

Breaking News: After the success of the MLS Hair Report, Sports Illustrated has decided to latch on to and leech off of my and Akeem's brilliant and creative ideas.

To quote the article:

A distinctive mullet that soon would light up MLS matches identified Juan Carlos Toja to FC Dallas players during their 2007 preseason trip to Brazil, yet soon enough they realized in this case, whatever impressions that image might suggest didn't fit the man.

"A lot of players in South America wear their hair that way," says FC Dallas coach Steve Morrow, who himself keeps very short what little he has left, of his Colombian midfielder. "You'd think he'd be like a rock star, but he's not that way at all, just the opposite in fact."

Toja, in fact, is perplexed and somewhat embarrassed by all the attention lavished on his mane, which just months after his first MLS match prompted club management to stage "Juan Toja Wig Night," an honor previously bestowed upon a fellow countryman, former superstar Carlos Valderrama. Aside from their distinctive 'dos and shared heritage, they're as different as attacking midfielders can be.

If you had not noticed, the site purposely declined to give a publishing date in order to quiet speculation on the illegal "borrowing" of intellectual property. Their lawyers can expect to hear from me soon.


In other news, according to sources at, the second best site for Seattle Sounders FC coverage, Sounders FC gear is now available from WinCraft, Inc.

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