Major Link Soccer: YSA Sanctions, Pele with Cosmos

The YSA chant (You Suck Asshole) at MLS matches is like a zombie virus. Once the first person was infected, it spread like wildfire, until a few smart folk banded together to beat out the madness (though the level of violence thankfully diverges here and ruins the whole parallel). Real Salt Lake is hardly in a "The Last of Us" position, but they think they have a cure; stop the chant, or we'll make life difficult for our most die-hard fans.

Eddie Johnson is rocking a new hair... a new hair something... after he showed up to practice totally bleached. DeAndre Yedlin denies responsibility, claiming he was "out of the country" when this went down. That's a likely story. In other news, Wesley Snipes has joined the Sounders on loan.

Speaking of home grown Sounders, Prosoccertalk has his game status as key to a Sounders' result against DC United tonight. Even flying across country and with the worst record in the league, United is a dangerous team that could emerge out of their slump any given week, and no one wants to be the team that fell victim first.

The Cosmos were the best of the NASL and the worst of the NASL. Their exorbitant spending brought in players like Pele and a following that continued for decades after their downfall. Those same spending habits also ruined the league and set soccer back a generation in the United States. Now, the Cosmos are set to make a return to the lower league NASL (as well as rumored to be NY3 in not so long a period) and Pele will be there to tell the fans that it's okay to get behind the team.

Toronto FC's Waking the Red has taken it upon themselves to offer help to our Northwestern brothers in Calgary with a whole "Canadian Ton" of ways to help the victims of the recent flooding.

If you're the sort of Sounder at Heart reader that doesn't participate in the MLS game threads because of silly things like "the games aren't on in my area", MLS has you covered. NBC Sports will be hosting another "MLS Breakaway" on August 3rd, following five games in a day and bringing the results to you as they happen. Last time we all missed it because the Sounders were playing at home or something, but this time there is NO SUCH CONFLICT.

Goal Line Tech is already making soccer cooler, but do you know what would be even better than that? LASERS. Nike is setting up night time soccer matches where the field looks like something out of a 2D Tron videogame. Cue the countdown until the EPL does a once-yearly "Blackout" match, which is immediately cancelled when the lights are turned on to reveal almost a dozen players with lacerations and an opposing eleven whistling while twiddling their tacked thumbs.

Sporting KC traded away a Kansas City product to Toronto for a draft pick in 2015.

Bob Bradley has been through alot in his short time with the Egyptian National Team, but the "American Pharaoh" is sticking it out through all the tests and trials.

Everyone's favorite MLS official was scheduled to head up today's Sounders match, but was switched away. Still, Mr. Mayers at the Times had a tweet ready for the occasion:

I would say Saturday is set to be Schmid's 400th MLS game, but if Ricardo Salazar is the ref Wednesday, let's take things one game at a time

— Joshua Mayers (@joshuamayers) July 2, 2013

Oh, and I got accepted to the University of Washington on Monday. I'll be starting in the fall. At only five years late to the party, I am going to have like, the sixth-best alcohol tolerance on campus, after Michael Young and my first three professors. Wait, I meant four. Did I mention I'm getting into a University?