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Major League Standings- Red Bull is the best energy drink jersey in MLS

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The rest of MLS keeps scoring goals and trying to get away from us. It'll change soon but for this weekend, it is not fun...again.

Montreal got a swift kicking of the butt
Montreal got a swift kicking of the butt
Jean-Yves Ahern-USA TODAY Sports

The Sounders gave everyone new hope with a CCL draw on Wednesday in Vancouver. It did not work out too well for us points wise in LA or elsewhere with the East refusing to beat SKC and the rest of top West sides picking up wins. The cream is starting to separate in the standings but as long as we keep a playoff spot, we will, then we'll be fine. Now, a journey through the fun scorelines that were throughout the MLS this week.

With so many matches this week write ups may be shorter and/or less media (to save you the time of loading double-digit videos at work).

Wednesday 8/5-

Yes while some of us were in Vancouver, me, or at least watching the Sounders play the 'Caps, some teams played in MLS.

Montreal Impact 1 - New York Red Bulls 1: Playing in Montreal, the Impact hoped they could pick up points on the East as they are still trying to show the performances that had everyone thinking they'd make a run post CCL-Final. They did not play poorly but they still are not playing well. Dominic Oduro scored another goal giving his side a lead in the 42nd. The defense couldn't hold giving up a 52nd minute goal to Lloyd Sam. They should just kiss their lucky stars they didn't lose with Laurent Ciman going off with his second yellow in the 79th.

Toronto "USMNT" FC 4 - Orlando City 1:The other MLS match of the night was a lot more exciting than the CCL ones or MTLvRBNY. Really all you need to know is Sebastian Giovinco. Nothing else matters from this one. Converting a 12th minute PK, to go up 1-0. Taking the lead again with a 56th minute goal. And then the clincher in his hattrick coming in the 88th. Each side picked up a few cards in a wide open and messy game that produced fireworks. Side note, if you own Giovinco in MLS Fantasy Leagues and did not captain him, you should cry.

Friday 8/7-

Portland Trees 1 - Chicago Fire 0: The player PDX fans hate, Fernando Adi, came through again with his 10th of the season. The lone goal in this one coming from flicking it over the goalie from a yard out. After an attempted pass at the near post to Adi was tipped, he got a toe to it pushing it over the diving goalie and gave his side a 1-0 lead. In true Chicago fashion, they did not threaten or do anything that mattered for the rest of the match.

Saturday 8/8-

Toronto "USMNT" FC 1 - Sporting Kansas City Wizards 3: Two goals in the 22nd minute, one per side. Benny Feilhaber converted after drawing Kevin Ellis drew a PK. Only seconds after the restart Toronto pushed and Michael Bradley turned a give and go with Giovinco into a tying goal. But that was the last of Toronto's dominance, Krisztian Nemeth and Jacob Peterson each scored to give the Wizards a two goal advantage and win on Canadian soil. Though he didn't suit up in the 18 this match had the possibility for an interesting reunion with Herc Gomez now a TFC player after complaining for years that SKC would not let others sign him.

Orlando City 0 - Philly Union 0: The battle of Purple Lions vs bread loafs ended in a truly boring scoreless draw. Though 19 total shots were taken, the teams combined for five on target and only one yellow. If you can't sleep one night this week, put this on and you will.

Montreal Impact 0 - DC United 1: Impressive stat line of the week for you: Montreal Impact 25 - DC United 1. That is total shots. It was 8 to 1 on target. But there is where total shots do not matter (ask Portland about that Cal FC game, they'll confirm this) because Chris Rolfe scored on the one and only shot DC took in this one in the 13th minute and that was all that ended up mattering. If you are Montreal you got one point from six at home this week. You out shot a team 25-1 and did not score. You should probably just sit there all day chanting "Give Us Drogba" until he plays because otherwise it is going to get ugly-er.

Houston Dynamo 2 - San Jose Earthquakes 1: In a battle of the Earthquakes Past and Present it was the past side that came away with a win, though they look nothing like a Earthquake stamped Dominic Kinnear side (that is a good thing, be proud of that Houston), they carry the name and that is something I will not let them forget. For once though I wanted the present side, since they had less points going into the match. The game got extremely chippy with five yellows and a red given out. DeMarcus Beasley gave HOU a lead in the 55th, Fatai Alashe gave HOU a 1-man lead in the 60th. 10 minutes later, Quincy Amarikwa tied it up for the side that was down the man. Alex got the side the win six minutes later as they man advantage was key in holding off the charging Quakes for the last 15. In other news, Cubo Torres is still not starting.

Colorado Rapids 1 - Kei Kamara FC 2: The Crew got back to winning ways through the MLS leading goal scorer Kei Kamara. Colorado gave their fans hope, I know cruel move, Bobby Burling gave his side a 1-0 lead through a 42nd minute header off a Vicente Sanchez free kick. Gregg Berhalter told his team at half, "ya'll couldn't score if your lives depended on it" (I'm paraphrasing of course). Kei took this upon himself to prove his coach wrong, scoring in the 52nd and 64th to give his side a goal lead, which they held on. FYI, seven yellows and a red in this blood letting. Kamara also almost had a hattrick on a ridiculous thing of beauty.

Vancouver Whitecaps 4 - Real Salt Lake 0: We are not the only side that the 'Caps beat up on. I honestly don't want to talk about them because well Vancouver is bugging me right now with their instance on winning...Octavio Rivero, Pa Modou Kah (again), and two from Cristian Techara in this one gave the 'Caps the 4-0 win over the quickly collapsing Utah club. I think the Utes should be giving up this year but since the window is closed, they are unable to unload some players to clubs who want to make a run and bring in some sweet, sweet, sweet allocation dollars. Maybe I overreacted?? No Nick Rimando or Kyle Beckerman but...come on.

Sunday 8/9-

Los Angeles Galaxy 3 - Sounders FC 1: Barrett Time!!! HE SCORED!!! The first half was good overall but it did not end that way sadly. We'll go back to picking everyone off by a couple of goals once Clintfemi, Valdez, Ivanschitz, and Ozzie are on the field.

New Jersey Red Bulls 2 - Manchester City Lite FC 0: In the "Battle for New York" the Red Bulls showed up and used two Wright-Phillips, Bradley and Shaun, to win this one. NYCFC tried and did not play poorly but they did not play well and Pirlo and Lampard went all retiree league and looked poor. Felipe's 85th minute goal ensured that the energy drink promos would sweep the Premier League babies this season.

We are still in playoff position. Houston has a game in hand though...but we hold the tiebreaker so that's something. I won't lie, the standings right now do not look the prettiest but after another handful of games and with our best XI, they should be looking rosy again.

MLS Standings 8-9

MLS Standings

USL-

Sounders 2 fell apart this weekend too. Falling to Vancouver in fairly sad fashion. Without Andy Craven, Victor Mansaray, Aaron Kovar, Darwin Jones, Damion Lowe, and Oniel Fisher the side had a bit of shake up, up top and in the midfield. That being said there were plenty of bright spots. Pablo Rossi and Oalex Anderson (sub) looked great again. Andres Correa and Guiliano Frano showed fairly good decision making at fullback. If LA II wins tonight, it would push the Sounders all the way down from 1st entering the weekend to 4th. Colorado Springs and Oklahoma City both seized the opportunity with the S2 lose and jumped over them in the standings as the season winds down.

USL Standings 8-9

USL Standings