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Major League Standings: Sounders get first win while Geiger Geiger's elsewhere

We finally won! And we're not last in MLS anymore, just in the Western Conference.

Geiger gonna Geiger
Geiger gonna Geiger
Stew Milne-USA TODAY Sports

Panic over! The Sounders won. We are no longer the lowest team in the table (league wide), we are right on the heels of the Cascadia side with four points and our next opponent (the Orange Texans), meaning we can pole vault to 8th in the West next week (and yes that still sounds kind of bad).

Friday 4/1-

There were no games....April Fools!

New England Revolution 1 - New York Red Bulls 0: For some stupid reason PRO put Mark Geiger back on the pitch and he blew it again, giving Felipe a red for a call that was questionable at best. It was the biggest error in that match, but you know it's Geiger so there were plenty. The goal was scored with Demar Lawrence on the ground injured when the long ball was played, and the Revs decided to shoot and score instead of play the ball out when they were 3v1 in the box. It's the question: In an attacking area, do you play it out, and the answer appears to be no for Jay Heaps' men.

Saturday 4/2-

Chicago Fire 1 - Philly Union 0: The Fire on their quest to not be the worst team possible beat the team that's tied for first in the East (yes Philly is, and that's impressive except that the team is the Union and they are still the Union). Red card in this one too, but it was after the goal was scored so don't blame that. Oh, and the pitch was intense.

Colorado Rapids 1 - Toronto FC 0: Three straight games this weekend ended 1-0. Why? Because they are boring and teams can't score, apparently. Oh, it is also three straight red cards. Colorado got an advantage on the field after two Benoit Cheyrou yellows, one in the 11th and one in the 13th. Luis Solignac scored five minutes later and the Rapids never looked back. Or really just got lucky that Toronto didn't score against the run of play because Colorado dominated yet could not get a goal. The Rapids will get Jermaine Jones on the field soon, and in the summer Tim Howard. Will that do anything for them? I don't think anything beneficial, as they'll probably collapse even with the veterans late on as they usually do.

Sporting Kansas City 1 - Real Salt Lake 2: A late Benny Feilhaber PK ended the RSL shutout, but that's all the goal did. Justin Glad and Luke Mulholland's goals ensured a victory for RSL. Oh, and somehow these two teams didn't produce a red card. Now tell me that of all four games you've read about so far you would've picked this one as no reds...exactly.

FC Dallas 1 - Columbus Crew 1: Columbus owns worst record in MLS now, suckers. A late goal by Tesho Akindele, a tap in after an Urruti shot from distance hit the post and then the hit Steve Clark in the back and sat up right near the goal line, but Akindele finished it easily to bring Dallas even with 13 minutes plus stoppage to go. Columbus' inability to keep the shutout cost them their first win of the season and the ability to be at four points instead of two.

Sounders FC 1 - Montreal Impact 0: WE DID IT!!! FINALLY!!! CLINT DEMPSEY GOT A GOAL!!!!!! WOO HOO!!!

Vancouver Whitecaps 0 - Los Angeles Galaxy 0: LA Galaxy had over an hour to score in Vancouver being up a man after Matias Laba saw red for tackle slightly harsher than Felipe's and yet they did nothing. No Robbie Keane equals no goals it appears and that's pretty good for MLS opponents. It's only GD keeping them above the red through four games, so...there's really no point there but I just don't want them doing well.

San Jose Earthquakes 1 - DC United 1: Lamar Neagle did something!! His cross to Patrick Nyarko gave DC United a 34th minute lead. The one shutout this year was a bit lucky as the post-Bill-Hamid defense is a bit vulnerable. Shea Salinas found Adam Jahn in the 88th to ruin DC United's road trip and chance at their first win, but at least they still have more points than Columbus with three draws. Also no reds.

Sunday 4/3-

Orlando City SC 4 - Portland Timbers 1: Well this was definitely the Kaka show. Two assists and one goal. He would've put his side up 4-0 after Kevin Molino was taken down for a PK, but he knew how much a goal would mean for the former USL star who was sidelined with an ACL tear all 2015 so he let him take it. Molino put it pretty close to the keeper but just kept past his finger tips and inside the post. An inability to clear led to Portland getting a goal. Diego Valeri fired a shot on goal that bounced around, he found it, slid it across the face of goal to Jack Mac and they at least gave themselves an iota of respect in the Sunshine State. Fanendo Adi gave himself a new reason to be hated by PDX fans after missing a PK in the 42nd minute that could've made it 2-1 going into the half.

Sounders may be the bottom team in the Western Conference, but this weekend gave us plenty of hope and red cards. The reds won't stop, so let's just hope we don't see any on our side. Also we aren't even in second to last league wide, we're in 17th -- there are three teams worse than us.

USL-

S2 is looking rather unfortunate. Another loss, this time 3-0 at home against San Antonio. This means three losses by average of 2-0. Not a single goal for the kids. While this team is all about development and being last place doesn't matter if the club is getting minutes for players, progressing, and growing them it is 1) unfortunate to sit at the bottom, and 2) disheartening to see no goals in 270 minutes of home play and scorelines that have gotten worse each match (1-0, 2-0, and finally 3-0). Let's hope a spark gets lit and the boys start showing their potential on both sides of the ball.

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