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Just a few of the Portlands that are better than the city in Oregon

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Portland, Maine leads the list

Portland, Maine - Roger Levesque kind of covers this one.

Isle of Portland, England - This tied island isn’t the traditional tied island that is connected via a tombolo (think Maury Island, Washington), but instead by a barrier beach that drifted and now connects the island to the larger land mass. That’s pretty cool.

Portland Harbor, England - It’s the world’s largest man-made harbor. As Sounders fans, we know that quantity and quality matter.

Portland San Antonio - a pro handball team in Spain that is now defunct, but when they did play they won 11 major trophies, which is many more than the Timbers.

Portland Sea Dogs - A minor league baseball team in Maine. Seattle also had a team called the Sea Dogs. Brian Schmetzer played for them. They won a championship while Portland, Oregon didn’t even have a pro soccer team.

Portland Pirates - A minor league hockey side founded in the same year as the Portland Timbers, 1975. Facts about the Pirates include; NHL defending champion coach Barry Trotz coached there in the 1990s, Pirates are cooler than Timbers and will commit less fouls than Diego Chara. Also, Roger Levesque is a pirate.

Pirates don't have wings. They don't need them.
Pirates don’t have wings. They don’t need them.
Otto Greule Jr

Portland, Connecticut - It has a castle, and if there’s anything you know about Sounder at Heart, it’s our fascination with the Sounders, and castles.

Portland Sheep - You have to check out their kick ass horns. They’d make a better mascot than a lumber dude.

Portland Island, B.C. - When Princess Margaret visited the province of British Columbia they gave her the island. Not even a decade later she gave it back and now it’s a park. Portland, Oregon never gave royalty anything (don’t fact check that).

Havenland (Dutch for Portland) - The land surrounding the Port of Antwerp and the Scheldt River in Belgium. There are many things to do in Havenland, including scenic bike rides better than any in the Oregonian city of the same name

The Earl of Portland - Timothy Charles Robert Noel Bentinck might be a well-known actor on the BBC show The Archers, but to us he is royalty, kinda. That basically makes him Clint Dempsey, because Clint owns Portland.

Portland Orange - When you see the “Don’t Walk” sign in reddish-orange, that’s Portland Orange. This Portland saves lives.

New Portland, Maine - It’s what Portland, Oregon should have called themselves, but they couldn’t be that creative. New Portland was gifted to Maine by Massachusetts as compensation for the British burning Falmoth (modern day good Portland).

Portland Cement - Known now as modern cement, the widely used building material was created in the Isle of Portland in England. It is the opposite of the Timbers defense; not porous, versatile and strong.

Hyder, Alaska - This place was called Portland, but then the U.S. Post Office told them that there were a lot of Portlands so they changed their name. Good job, Hyder, no need to copy the dozens of other Portlands in the U.S. that are older than Portland, Oregon.