Román Torres (pictured above) pulled up to the stadium on Sunday knowing that he was going to be in the starting XI for the first time since returning from suspension, and you could tell that he was feeling himself. If you make a triumphant return to the starting lineup by putting up a shutout, scoring your first MLS goal, AND you rock a pair of aviators that seem specifically designed to do cocaine off of them you’re absolutely going to lead this column. Sorry, them’s the rules.
Ultimately this outfit’s pretty simple, with Torres’s accessories doing the heavy lifting. I do need to take a moment to note how well this shirt fits him, though. Román Torres is a Big Dude. You may recall that he was the heaviest player at the men’s World Cup last year, and seemingly every pound of him is finely-sculpted muscle. It is not easy to find clothes that fit a man like that well, and so whether you like his style choices or not you absolutely have to appreciate the man’s sense for tailoring. This shirt is fitted enough to show off how built Torres is without looking painted on or ridiculous. The short-sleeved banded collar shirt is a really good look - Alex Roldan also wore one, although his was more of a cream or tan color - and this black one serves as the perfect foil to the more extravagant pieces Torres used to finish off his look.
Speaking of Torres’s accessories, let’s just run through all of the ones that you can see in this picture. There’s the sunglasses, earrings, two chains(!!!), a gold bracelet, and a ring. He’s also almost certainly wearing a watch and at least his wedding ring on his left hand, as well. Román loves accessories, and for that I love Román. I would be in dereliction of my duties if I didn’t acknowledge the thing that is missing from this picture, which is Torres’s hair. We all saw that he had cut off his locs before the San Jose game to mark his return to the team, and while I am admittedly a fan of the incredibly clean fade he’s sporting now I will always have a special place in my heart for all of the hair styles that came before. RIP to Román’s locs.
Look, I love Jordan Morris, and this picture feels like he’s looking through the camera directly at me, and his eyes say they’re happy to see me. I’m putting that out there so that you know that what comes next is from a place of love, from a belief in what he’s capable of accomplishing. This outfit is boring. It’s not bad. It’s fine. I’m on the record as liking this jacket and loving the necklace. I think he’s got a good haircut, and the stubble is an incredibly good look for my guy. He’s been running back effectively the same outfit with alarming regularity, though, and I can’t stand idly by while he continues to settle for the same ol’, same ol’. Jordan is capable of greatness, he can put together ‘fits that belong at a Pitti Uomo show, and I have to believe that he’s just been saving his best for the playoffs.
I really dig this jacket. “Luxurious” and “trucker jacket” aren’t really words or phrases that I’d typically expect to go together, but that’s the only appropriate way that I can think of to describe this. While I can’t see much of Smith’s sweater, I do like what I can see. Black-on-black is a pretty solid start to an outfit, and a simple graphic stripe is a great way to bring some interest to the look. All told, it’s a pretty solid look. I just wish that he’d do something different with his facial hair, something a little less Three Musketeer-y.
Raúl Ruidíaz is doing...a lot here. I don’t totally know what’s going on here, if I’m totally honest. He’s got a quilted vest that seems cool. With the vest and turtleneck combo, he’s clearly ready for Festive Gourd Season and pumpkin/apple picking with his kids. Take a second and zoom in on that turtleneck, though. I can’t quite tell if it’s the turtleneck or another piece over the turtleneck that’s got a just outrageous amount of distressing on it. It almost look like he’s wearing a scarf? But the distressing continues down the sleeves and on the chest of the shirt, and the top extends down to his mid-thigh. The length would be cool in a long-line, layering pieces in different lengths and shapes sort of way, but combined with the distressing it just feels like too much. To add to it, Ruidíaz went for a heavily distressed pair of jeans in a blue wash instead of black, which is fine, but a black pair would have made the whole thing more cohesive and successful in my opinion.
For those curious, Nico’s cardigan fits the way that Luchi Gonzalez’s should have. The style’s are slightly different - Luchi’s was longer - but the fit’s pretty great on Nico’s. I also have to say that I think wearing a v-neck sweater with no shirt underneath is kind of a weird move, but goalkeepers are weirdos, and beautiful, perfect, stylish, artistic, Sweet Stefan Frei is a goalkeeper.
That’s all for now, but I’ll be back for the playoffs! Whose look was your favorite this week?