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Ranking the Sounders Valentine’s poems

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A definitive sorting of the Valentine’s Day poems from the Sounders.

Max Aquino / Sounder at Heart

It’s Valentine’s Day, which means it’s time for a lot of public expressions of love. Some people may choose flowers and chocolate, some expensive jewelry. The Seattle Sounders have chosen to share some poetry they’ve been working on just for this occasion.

We could just appreciate these poems, the brief moments of wonder, for their own sake - they’re sweet and fun! - but does anything truly exist if it hasn’t been critiqued? Today I’m going to rank the five poems based on how much they make me love the player, starting with number 5!

No. 5: Justin Dhillon

“Roses are red,

Violets are blue.

In order to be 100

it’s 99 plus you.”

-Justin Dhillon

Dhillon’s poem is fine. He wears the number 99, so it’s fun that he’s playing on that, but it involves math and I just can’t get on board with that.

No. 4: Will Bruin

“Roses are red,

Violets are blue.

I’ve got two thumbs up,

and they’re both for you.”

-Will Bruin

The double thumbs-up is a classic Will Bruin move. I love it, it’s iconic. This placement has almost nothing to do with the poem itself, it’s just a reflection of how great the rest of the poems are.

No. 3: Cristian Roldan

“Roses are red

the sky is blue

I’m getting a ring this year,

would you like one too?”

-Cristian Roldan

I think we can all get behind another ring. I’m not 100% sure if he’s talking about the ring he’ll get for winning the 2019 MLS Cup, or if he’s talking about winning another one, but both are wonderful. This would be even higher if Jordan Morris had been the one behind this poem, just because he’s engaged and the added layer of meaning behind “getting a ring” would have been truly delightful.

No. 2: Xavier Arreaga

“Roses are red,

The sky is blue.

I tuck in my shirt

Just for you.”

-Xavier Arreaga

Xavier Arreaga has quickly become the most fun personality on the team. He knows we all love his tucked jerseys - even if we also kind of hate it - and he thinks that’s fun! He finds joy in everything, and this poem was a pure expression of that! Well done!

No. 1: Nouhou

“Roses are red

violets are blue.

I run like a train,

Nouhou choo choo!”

-Nouhou

Do they still power trains with coal? God, I hope not. Regardless, the Nouhou choo choo is powered by a renewable resource, and it’s the sheer delight with which Nouhou plays soccer. This poem is beautiful and funny, deserving of first place, and maybe even good enough to earn him the starting left back spot on its own. Go ahead and dab on ‘em Nouhou! Choo choo!